Sunday, August 18, 2013

"Do Not Tell Me 'It Can't Be Done'"

Pearl Harbor is one of my favorite movies. Arguably, this is one of the most moving scenes. School has suggested I don't do FT--I either withdraw for this semester or do PT. I will be asking my doctor what will happen if I do FT school, even if I'm  not actually ready.

It's a lot easier for people to say pushing school off isn't a big deal when it's not them. I didn't just give up everything and move halfway across the country because I only kind of care about school. School has always and will always be my priority. More than work, more than my health, and more often than I care to admit, more than my relationships. Is it wrong? Probably. But school comes first.

My friend asked "Is it worse to delay your degree or to delay your recovery?"
My degree.
She was a little mad.

I've basically been resting/sleeping from 5pm Friday until now. (So the past 48 hours..)
I'm about to go back to sleep.
Still have massive headaches.
Still super irritable. And now really frustrated.
Less anxious, as I was in the first two weeks.
Still can't concentrate.
I either sleep all the time or can't sleep at all.
But I'm always tired.

I have to meet with HR on Monday. My doctor on Wednesday.

If the doctor says it will be difficult to do school FT, I'll do it. If the doctor says I may cause permanent damage if I over stimulate the brain too quickly, I may consider my options. If the doctor says it'll just delay my recovery, but I'll still eventually be fine and it'll just be really difficult, I'll do it FT.

I only have one more freaking year of school. That's all. I just want to finish. 

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