Kind of a Big Deal

Today is Easter! Orrrr, better known as Resurrection Sunday. Meaning...today is kind of a big deal.

Basically. My Jesus was born miraculously. Then He lives this perfect life and does all kinds of cool things. And then. This is the part that really blows my mind. Then. He dies on the cross. For no other reason other than He loves you. He loves me. He loves us. He takes that one step further. And conquers the grave. He raises from the dead. Crazy talk! Death couldn't hold Him down.

Here's the deal. The cross, that thing that happened 2,000 years ago, changed everything. That cross changes everything. It's kind of a big deal. My Jesus, my God. He's kind of a big deal. When He died, He took on everything. Every sin. Every little sin, every big sin. Everything that we feel guilty about, feel ashamed of. He took that on and forgave them in full.

We are no longer bound by law, by sin, by shame. Rather, because of what He did, we are free. We are forgiven, loved, and free. Not because of the good thing we did or can do, but because Jesus died on the cross and rose again.

My God is alive. My Redeemer Lives. And that's a huge deal. He changed everything when He died and rose again. 

Today is the Day

These past couple of weeks have been pretty sour and today was no exception. It wasn't horrible, but in no way was it a solid day. I got out of class early (which was a definite plus) and realized that I was in desperate need of some Jesus time. Just hang time with Him, just me and Him. It was still light outside, so I took my Bible, journal, and Mac and found a spot on the grass by my building. I put on some Jesus jams and started journaling a little bit. Then I laid down and just listened for Him.

I picked up my Bible and started reading Galatians. That book blew my mind. It reminded me of things that I realized I had forgotten. If I had my Bible with me, I'd share some of the things I was reminded of...I'll do that later when I get it. I learned a lot today.

I also remembered that...today is the day. Today is the day that He has made.

Even though I'm frustrated, tired, aggravated, nervous, anxious, etc, I can rest in Him and trust that He is good. All the time. 

Inconvenient

I always seem to think of something to write about for this at the most inconvenient time. I have less than two hours to do some homework assignments that are due, well really, really soon (like three hours). Normally I just stay up and do work and either I get sleep or I don't and I figure it out...but last night I was exhausted by like 2:00am. What the what?! (By the way, that saying was introduced to me just recently and I really enjoy it.) That was so early. I crashed in my bed within an hour (I think..? I have no idea what time I went to bed, but I hope it was around then...). 2:00am is kind of early for some of us here on north campus..our normal bedtime is around 4:00am...and yes, we know that's not okay, we're working on it...

Anyways! So I didn't finish my homework and they are kind of..well important and "major" assignments, which is just awesome...soo, this will be short. I just had some thoughts...or realizations, rather.

1. I like lists. I realized today that I liked them because they are easy to follow and understand.
2. I hate the word "blog". 
3. I'm not very good at this whole blogging thing. 

• Other people seem to have it down...they share things, they treat it more like a journal, more like a "narrative", a story about them. Which I'm pretty sure is the technical definition of blog...let me check. Blog: A web site on which an individual or group of users produces an ongoing narrative. Yep, I was right. 
• But maybe...I'm not doing this completely wrong. However, I don't really want to hear that this is "mine" and I can do whatever I want with it and write whatever I want. Mainly because I'm not one of those continuum kind of persons. I like definitions (not vocabulary, there is a difference) and I like doing things right. 
• Ah. I just realized. I do share things. Not necessarily about what's going on and stuff. But things I care about. It may not be a "journal" and more like...well, papers. (Right, is this not full of school paper like entries?)

Whether or not I will ever really use this to tell stories about my life...wait, I just thought of at least two entries that are "real"!

So scratch this whole post. I'm "real" sometimes! And the times that I'm not "real" doesn't mean I'm the opposite of that, just so you know. 

We Are In This Together

India! Below is something I made, summing up the trip to India. I made it on a program I had never used before (iWeb) and so I had to print it and then scan it in order for me to show it to others. I apologize for it looking so faint! I have a support letter that you can have if you would like, detailing the trip and reasons for going.

There are two ways in which I need support.


1. Prayer Support

• Pray that God will prepare my heart before departure
• Pray for the team's safety while there
• Pray that all of our financial needs will be met
• Pray that I will be prepared with vaccinations, visa, travel info
• Pray that the team will bond and support one another
• Pray for our strength, as we prepare to go and while we are in India
• Pray that we will shower unconditional love on those we meet

2. Financial Support

• All donations are tax deductible
• Make checks out to Adventures in Missions
• By mail
• Ashley Coulter
• PO Box 6500
• Flagstaff, AZ 86011
• Online
• www.adventures.org
• Donate-->Mission Trip Participant-->Real Life-->Ashley Coulter

In a previous post, I discussed why I love money. I love money because it forces me to be humble. I love money because it allows anyone and everyone to get involved. I love money because it can empower people. I love money because it shows that I can't do this alone, that we are all in this together. 

By donating and helping fund this trip, you are trusting me to love on these girls in India. You are trusting me to represent America, Christ, and the Church well. 

This blog started by me wanting to tell the world about my God. It's called "Dear World...I love you" for a reason. I want to act out what I write. I want to live out loud. I don't want to just write about things, just talk about things, I want to move. You can be part of this movement with me. 

Support: Give assistance to; enable to act. 

Mission Statement

For one of my classes we have to do a mission statement.

I have been thinking about this assignment ever since I heard about it, which was about 1 1/2 years ago...yeah, I realize that is a long time. Anyways, I just recently started really thinking about it. What my mission statement was and all of that...and then I learned we also had to present it. Originally, no lie, I thought Okay, that's easy..powerpoint. Boom. Done. Then I learned it wasn't that kind of presentation. No, this presentation was something much different. This presentation had to be real, had to be legit, and in some sense, had to have creativity in some fashion. Once I realized that, my first thought was Crap. I don't have a creative bone in my body. And then! To make it even more difficult. We weren't given any guidelines. No restrictions, nothing. Just go. Just do a mission statement.

If you know me at all, you know that I need guidelines. I need something! I don't do the whole "run with it" and just go with the flow thing. To give you an example, sometimes people say "just write". Just write whatever comes to mind, don't think, just write. Here's the issue with me: Nothing comes to my mind. Nothing flows from my writing utensil (or fingers when typing) if I am not given anything. Nothing happens. I'm telling you, I need guidelines. I need something. Something I have learned about myself over the recent years is that I can be "creative", I can stretch my mind and do kind of cool things. But only when I am given some guideline. It sounds weird and I can better explain it if you want, but it's true. If you give me nothing to start with, I will end up with nothing. If you give me just a little smidgen of something, I can end up with something neat and potentially beyond your expectations. But I need something.

So anyways, my point is that our only guideline was this: Do a mission statement.
Uh? That left me with 902358935830 questions and zero ideas.

Last week I was finally given some kind of guideline, some kind of starting point. I should pick something I care about or something I am good at and roll with that.
What I am good at:

• Walking
• Okay, so I do trip...often
• Breathing
• Okay, so one of my favorite things about cold weather is that I can see my breath, which not only allows me to feel like a dragon, it also reminds me that I am breathing. (Soo maybe I am not good at breathing if I need to be reminded that I am...)
• Loving
• Well, sometimes. Sort of. 
• How the heck am I supposed to tangibly present love to a class?
• Writing
• What am I going to do, write a paper and read it?

What I care about:

• Jesus
• People
• Injustices

Alriiiiiiiiight....so those lists were not the least bit helpful for me. The first list led me nowhere. That second list, how the heck am I supposed to put that into a "presentation"?

Then I thought, maybe I am thinking about this too logically. I need to just embrace irrationality and figure out a way to make something out of nothing. 

Well, that thought failed. It may work for you all, but not for me. I am logical (usually...). So why would I get rid of my logic when I am trying to produce my mission statement? Why get rid of something that is part of me when I am trying to state who I am and what I am doing in my life? That seems silly. 

So I thought. And thought. And thought some more. And I embraced my logic. And I think I have finally came up with something. 

It may not be as cool looking as other people's. It may not be as impressive as some others. It may not be as creative, it may not even be as emotional as others. But it's my statement. It's going to be logical. It's going to make sense. It's going to be done in a way that I do my life. 

"You Can't Do Everything"

I am always told that. By teachers, by my parents, by my friends, by my supervisors....by just about everyone. They tell me I can't do it all and I say "Yes, I can".

They're right though. I can't do everything. I will exhaust myself. I have exhausted myself. I have 20 hour days not just because I have so much to do, but because I have so much I want to do.

I want to support people, I want to be there for people, I want to have conversations with people, I want to go to dinner, to play games, to get my homework done, to get sleep, to have fun, to go to my classes, to eat ice cream, to be a kick butt RA, etc.

I was looking at my calendar just now...and it freaks me out. I have zero clue how I am going to pull some of these things off.

Here's how bad it is: I have never asked for extension on a deadline. Ever. No matter how many papers, tests, projects, IRs, or meetings I have in a week, I manage to do it all. And usually do it all well. I can do it. But currently, I can't. I had to ask for an extension. First time ever. In fact, I don't recall ever missing class so I could study or finish something for another class. I know a lot of people do that, but I don't think I had ever done that until this semester.

And these last few weeks of school are going to be even worse. I don't want to ask for extensions, I want to finish everything. I don't want to get 4 hours of sleep every night like I have been, I want to sleep like 7..or 9 like a normal human. And these last few weeks aren't only ridiculously difficult with academics, it's also with everything else in life.

Oh, and these are my last few weeks with my residents in my hall. So I want to make it awesome for them too and have fun with them and instill wisdom onto them.


How do other people balance this? How do you do everything on your calendar or planner? Someone once told me a secret, because I'm pretty sure I didn't make this up. It's this:


Ask for help. 


So I am. I need help finishing everything. I need help mailing things and purchasing things. I need help printing things. I need help waking up (some people have been helping, and it's been great). I need help realizing things. I need help to make a decision. I need help finishing strong.

Give me a hug. 

Write me a note. 

Write me a letter. 

Write on my board. 

Tell me something encouraging. 

Offer your assistance. 

Sit next to me. 

Hold my hand. 

Bring me some Dew.

I want to be seen as superwoman, who can do anything and everything and with ease. So this post was definitely a very real thing and a hard thing to admit. So be gentle when you help me. Don't rub it in my face that I am asking for help. Because then I can almost promise you that I will never do it again, as one snide comment may destroy me.