Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Good News/Bad News

Good news: I can breathe just fine
Bad news: My nose is crooked

Good news: I do not have brain tumor
Bad news: Doc actually thought I may have had one.

Good news: I do not have MS
Bad news: Doc thought may have that too, and said may still and just takes a long time for it to show up.

Good news: All tests are normal
Bad news: No answers

Good news: Docs think I'm sort of talking normal
Bad news: I'm definitely not.

Here is story:

Today I had appointment with ENT doctor to see about my nose. My nose is a little crooked, but it's not all that bad. Since I can still breathe, there is no need for actual surgery, but for cosmetics I can have OP surgery done to straighten nose. If surgery, then would have to do that within a few days before it really starts healing. I probably won't do the surgery, since I'm still dealing with concussion and if you didn't know me and look hard, can't really tell it's crooked and only slightly.

Talked more with ENT doctor and he thought I normally talked the way I talked today. Later I told mom I was very offended he thought that. After we explained that I'm usually pretty articulate and talk pretty well, he basically sprung into action and called hospital and ordered them to do more tests.

So yes, I had to go back to ER. Again. Fourth time less than one week. By then I was getting very tired and started having slight trouble walking. Met nurses and they were pretty worried about me and said I was showing atypical symptoms and not normal for concussion. Said I should have been pretty much better as far as speech and we had to explain again that I'm not dumb and don't skip words in normal speech and pretty good communicator. They also seemed to think it could be my normal speech. They asked what was different so I said:
-I am not using contractions
-I say "um"
-I'm talking very slowly and deliberately (mom's words)
-I skip words
-I affirm a lot
So then they did MRI and CT scan and more blood and urine tests. I've also been drinking a lot of water (like 20 glasses/day) and going to bathroom a lot (almost every hour).

So again, good news, everything came back normal. Bad news, there are literally zero answers.
Why do I drink so much water? Why do I have to go to the bathroom so often? Why is my speech so off? Why did I pass out in first place? When can I start work again? When can I drive again? When will my face look normal again (I have two black eyes from swelling and bruise from broken nose)
Don't know, not even a guess for any of those questions because everything is normal.

So then doctor started asking about mental illness, and thought I was making symptoms up (not exactly sure what doc thought, but did start asking about mental illness history and then put on discharge papers undiagnosed neurological or psychological issues or something like that) which brought on anxiety...and anxiety is part of concussion symptom, so I got very anxious tonight because I felt like doctor said I have mental illness.

Doctor also asked if I did drugs, specially shrooms, after all tests normal and thought that was reason. 

Doctor also talked to me about stress and thinks that was big part of problem and I just did too much and overloaded my brain.

But I really am getting better. And my speech is improving, just still deliberate and slow, but getting much better. And even this post is better English. I think I just have bad concussion and will be better very soon. I talked with my mom and she apologized for going a bit overboard...and she calmed me down about my anxiety about doctors thinking I normally talk this way and have SPMI.

Tomorrow I have normal doctor appt and will talk more with them.

I am getting better.
My English is getting much better.
I will be okay.
This is just result of bad concussion. 

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