I am always told that. By teachers, by my parents, by my friends, by my supervisors....by just about everyone. They tell me I can't do it all and I say "Yes, I can".
They're right though. I can't do everything. I will exhaust myself. I have exhausted myself. I have 20 hour days not just because I have so much to do, but because I have so much I want to do.
I want to support people, I want to be there for people, I want to have conversations with people, I want to go to dinner, to play games, to get my homework done, to get sleep, to have fun, to go to my classes, to eat ice cream, to be a kick butt RA, etc.
I was looking at my calendar just now...and it freaks me out. I have zero clue how I am going to pull some of these things off.
Here's how bad it is: I have never asked for extension on a deadline. Ever. No matter how many papers, tests, projects, IRs, or meetings I have in a week, I manage to do it all. And usually do it all well. I can do it. But currently, I can't. I had to ask for an extension. First time ever. In fact, I don't recall ever missing class so I could study or finish something for another class. I know a lot of people do that, but I don't think I had ever done that until this semester.
And these last few weeks of school are going to be even worse. I don't want to ask for extensions, I want to finish everything. I don't want to get 4 hours of sleep every night like I have been, I want to sleep like 7..or 9 like a normal human. And these last few weeks aren't only ridiculously difficult with academics, it's also with everything else in life.
Oh, and these are my last few weeks with my residents in my hall. So I want to make it awesome for them too and have fun with them and instill wisdom onto them.
How do other people balance this? How do you do everything on your calendar or planner? Someone once told me a secret, because I'm pretty sure I didn't make this up. It's this:
Ask for help.
So I am. I need help finishing everything. I need help mailing things and purchasing things. I need help printing things. I need help waking up (some people have been helping, and it's been great). I need help realizing things. I need help to make a decision. I need help finishing strong.
I want to be seen as superwoman, who can do anything and everything and with ease. So this post was definitely a very real thing and a hard thing to admit. So be gentle when you help me. Don't rub it in my face that I am asking for help. Because then I can almost promise you that I will never do it again, as one snide comment may destroy me.
They're right though. I can't do everything. I will exhaust myself. I have exhausted myself. I have 20 hour days not just because I have so much to do, but because I have so much I want to do.
I want to support people, I want to be there for people, I want to have conversations with people, I want to go to dinner, to play games, to get my homework done, to get sleep, to have fun, to go to my classes, to eat ice cream, to be a kick butt RA, etc.
I was looking at my calendar just now...and it freaks me out. I have zero clue how I am going to pull some of these things off.
Here's how bad it is: I have never asked for extension on a deadline. Ever. No matter how many papers, tests, projects, IRs, or meetings I have in a week, I manage to do it all. And usually do it all well. I can do it. But currently, I can't. I had to ask for an extension. First time ever. In fact, I don't recall ever missing class so I could study or finish something for another class. I know a lot of people do that, but I don't think I had ever done that until this semester.
And these last few weeks of school are going to be even worse. I don't want to ask for extensions, I want to finish everything. I don't want to get 4 hours of sleep every night like I have been, I want to sleep like 7..or 9 like a normal human. And these last few weeks aren't only ridiculously difficult with academics, it's also with everything else in life.
Oh, and these are my last few weeks with my residents in my hall. So I want to make it awesome for them too and have fun with them and instill wisdom onto them.
How do other people balance this? How do you do everything on your calendar or planner? Someone once told me a secret, because I'm pretty sure I didn't make this up. It's this:
Ask for help.
So I am. I need help finishing everything. I need help mailing things and purchasing things. I need help printing things. I need help waking up (some people have been helping, and it's been great). I need help realizing things. I need help to make a decision. I need help finishing strong.
Give me a hug.
Write me a note.
Write me a letter.
Write on my board.
Tell me something encouraging.
Offer your assistance.
Sit next to me.
Hold my hand.
Bring me some Dew.
I want to be seen as superwoman, who can do anything and everything and with ease. So this post was definitely a very real thing and a hard thing to admit. So be gentle when you help me. Don't rub it in my face that I am asking for help. Because then I can almost promise you that I will never do it again, as one snide comment may destroy me.
Ashley! Your transparency is such a blessing. Please know that I am so pumped to hang out with you in India this summer! God has got your back and is refining you in this time of balancing so many things and fundraising. We are all about the product, but He is all about the process. Trust in Him and rest in His presence. :))
ReplyDeleteAshley, You are always in my prayers! I know God will see you through your struggles.
ReplyDelete"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus."
Philippians 4:6-7
Blessings in Yeshua HaMashiach,
Joycelyn